This Is Not a Drill: I Am Seeing Ellie Today

 

Breaking news: it is cold and I am thriving.

Hello. It is me.

Harry Manilow.

And my day has reached critical levels of excitement.

I was calmly existing — being fluffy, being important, being a gentleman — when I heard the words that instantly rearranged my DNA:

“Harry, you’re going to see Ellie today.”

Ellie.

Icon. Legend. Best friend.

The human who makes me look like I belong on a shampoo bottle.

I lost all composure.

I zoomed in circles so fast my back legs briefly forgot the front legs.

I grabbed every toy I own at once.

I tripped over my own joy.

I barked at nothing — just in case Ellie could hear me from miles away.

My humans attempted to prepare for departure.

I attempted to help by:

• standing directly in the way

• sitting on the shoes

• offering my face for kisses every three seconds

Then came the realization:

It is 20 degrees outside.

No windows.

No breeze.

Just me, sealed in the car, vibrating with happiness like a microwave full of popcorn.

Every stoplight felt personal.

Every turn felt unnecessary.

I leaned forward.

I leaned back.

I sat.

I stood.

I sighed dramatically.

The heater was on.

The vibes were immaculate.

The destination was Ellie.

When we arrived, I tried to exit the car before it stopped moving.

I practically dragged my humans to the door like,

“Please do not delay my reunion.”

If you hear joyful chaos echoing from the groomer this morning, don’t be alarmed.

That’s just me seeing Ellie and immediately forgetting how to act.

Okay.

I’m here.

I have to go be beautiful.

— Harry Manilow